My Story So Far (4)

 I don't know how to start. My life has been a constant struggle and chaos. There has been no real person in my life or maybe I am so toxic that no one wants to stay in my life. When I reflect back to my past all I can see is stupid mistakes and parental pressure. In middle school, I was a people pleaser. I used to be very nice with people so that I could have their attention Back then I was very low on self-esteem. And I used to judge myself. Constantly cared about what others think of me. Well, I think I haven't changed much except for the fact that I don't care much about people because I realized people don't even stay in your life. And what they think is not at all your business.

When I was in fifth class, I was obsessed with barbie movies. And that obsession grew into very deep sadness. I don't know how to explain that feeling. It was not only barbie movies there were few celebrities and at one point dinosaurs too!. That feeling may or may not last long. But that time u compare your life with that celebrity and feel shit about yourself. And you constantly watch and try to learn and read every detail about them. That feeling sucks!

And yes another thing that comes to my mind when I look back at my past life Is that I have been always stressed. I used to stress about my exams very badly. I spent 3 consecutive nights without proper sleeping. I was not much of a bright student and never can be!.

The thing is my past has been very tragic from family problems (that are still there and will be there as long as my father is alive) to exams and whatnot.

I feel life is full of painful and hard days but it is also full of happiness and freedom. Right now I just feel like dying. I am going through the worst time of my life. I don't even feel like crying. People say oh you are gonna be okay. Your life will get better soon. Just stay positive and Blah blah... I am so tired of all that. I don't know why am I living seriously. For what and for whom. Well, I would just like to end this shitty summary of my life with this amazing quote I read recently Suicide is not cowardly. I will tell you what's cowardly. Treating people so bad that they end their lives. -Ashley purdy

Never Care About Other People's Opinions

 John or anyone does not like mashed potatoes and doesn't like sunsets. Does it have anything to do with you? No. And then John comes to you and says I really don't like you. He says I don't like the way you speak or cuss words that you say. Well okay, that is John's opinion that's how he feels but it has nothing to do with you.

"What will people think of me is actually none of my business."

 So when John says he doesn't like mashed potatoes do you get offended?

 No not. 

But when he says I don't like your hair and he is speaking directly to you.

 Do you start to feel a little bit worthless or not enough because everyone has worth issues and it comes from a lot of different places.

 It can come from your parents ( the average child is repeated eight times more than they are praised). But soon people and children learn that their natural state is not good and it doesn't fit in the world and it's not good enough for my parents they only love me when I am acting the way they want me to act. We all have a little bit of a few worth issues. So people have to buy new houses, cars. Their opinions have nothing to do with us and their opinions are none of your business. And that's really the way we should start looking at things.

 And what happens is when somebody says something we take it the wrong way.

 Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent.

 So if someone makes you feel inferior it's not their fault it's your fault.

 You went in public and someone cusses and you hate cuss words.

 Well, why do you hate cuss words? Is it because you actually hate cuss words or is it because you were taught to hate them? Maybe you have been taught that good people don't cuss or you have to be quiet and not seen or heard.

 And maybe you don't use the 'f' word or 's' word because it makes you sound unintelligent. Do you feel that there are smarter words than cussing? And if you are getting offended by what someone is saying you are giving up control of your life to other people's words then people are controlling you.

 You are changing the way you feel by something that is coming out of their mouths or sounds coming out of their face. We have to control ourselves more than to care about others' opinions.

 If someone has a problem with you that's their problem. That's not your problem. If you are living your true self and if someone is offended by the way you are living or in the house you live or car you drive or people that you love, the way you act dress or talk. That's not your issue that's their issue. The worse that you can do is dim your light to make other people feel a certain way around you; to make others not offended. If you are acting your trust it's the most beautiful authentic and amazing version of yourself as long as you are not trying to hurt anyone. There are tons of authentic versions of yourself. Everybody's different you don't have to fit the mold that society says you have to fit. You don't have to fit the mold that your mom tells you to fit.

 So express your truest you and if people have problems with it that's their problem. John does not like you. No big deal. Because if John doesn't like mash potatoes that's his problem as well. So be the truest version of yourself. Strip away what society has told you to be.

Powerful morning routine! 🌄🌞🌝☀

How you feel in the morning decides how you are going to feel the day ahead?

 Most humans forget that we are animals. We are animalistic by nature. The best way to change your life is to change your morning. If you have a really great morning you are gonna have a really great day.

So the point of having a morning routine is to be intentional and be proactive with your life

versus just being reactive with your life.

 So I'm going to give you a simple and powerful way to

start off your day.

You know I love acronyms and here is one of my favorites from a book I read recently called

“The Miracle Morning”.

"SAVERS"

S - silence (meditation, self-reflection).

just for twenty minutes is enough. I know there are many people who are hyperactive and it's

hard for them to sit at one place or . they get distracted easily or drift off to another world. Well,

it's totally fine... I had a quite hard time doing it too. But at least try meditation for five minutes or

three. And don't get mad if you are unable to do it. Through daily practice, you will start enjoying

it.

Reflection is another beautiful practice. Reflect upon your thoughts and actions. I usually do it

when I am alone and when there's rainy or gloomy weather outside. Asking yourself questions

like what did I learn from that challenging situation? What really matters to me? How can I be

better? can also help you.

A- Affirmations or incantations.

good enough already. Say it fifty times a minimum. Look in the mirror straight into your dead

eyes. You may say it loud or in your Mind but say it as you mean it. There is a really nice book

to help you with affirmations called You can heal your life by Louise hay. This book is

life-changing. It has a variety of affirmations to help you in every area of your life. Affirmations

can help you get rid of health problems too!! Isn't that great?

V- Visualization.

an effective way of visualizing is to believe that the thing you wanted has been already done and

you are expressing gratitude for that.

E- Exercise.

like jumping jacks, skipping, push-ups can help. You only need to get your heart racing.

R- Reading

very crucial. And reading books can help you grow so much. Choose a book of your choice.and

try to read five pages or more daily.

Self-help books, biographies of successful people, philosophical, spiritual books will expand

your knowledge very much.

S- Scribble

day, gratitude writing, goals for next week, or month.

This is it. All about the savers. So what are you excited about among these?

Take a cold shower every morning if you want to change your life. When you take a cold shower

you feel like you are freaking on top of the world.

Dominate the little voice in your head that keeps saying you are not good enough.

Have a shower playlist. Listen to positive and motivating songs. Songs which make you dance

and make you feel really good.

Brainwash yourself in the morning on how you wanna feel. Brainwash yourself by the music that

you listen to when you have that song stuck in your head and you sing it over and over again.

Music is just an affirmation.

Then get out your shower and what do you do?? You freaking dance. Dance around naked inside

of your bathroom.

Jumping up and down has a ton of different benefits. It flushes your lavatic system.

Look at yourself in the mirror and smile and jump. Just do it.

And say: Whatever it is in my life. Whatever it is that I'm trying to create I'm going to create and

nothing is going to stop me because I have a mentality of a tiger.

You are a freakin tiger. When you are going to walk in a room where you don't know anybody

then walk into that room like a tiger cuz a tiger would walk like a bitch!! Not caring about

anything.

Melatonin control tip: if you wake up and look at the blue sky. The receptors in your brain will

stop making melatonin which will make you feel less sleepy. Look at the sky for two minutes.

Sun can help too!

My Secret To Fight Anxiety

1. Ask yourself these questions.

          Are you Hungry?

          Are you Angry?

          Are you Lonely? 

          Are you Tired? 

HALT This is an acronym. 

You feel anxious most of the time when you have not eaten anything.

Try eating something healthy. Crappy food won't help that much.

You may feel anxious when you are pissed off at something. Your heart races how can she say this to me? Who does she think she is? 

Loneliness also drives you anxious. Meaningful human relationships are thus really important. Make sure you have your support system when you are anxious.

Tiredness is another factor that may make you feel anxious.  

After a long day at work or school, or after that nagging from the boss surely drives anyone crazy. 

For this, I recommend you to have a ‘me time’. Relax. Do anything that's gonna slow you down.  If you don't distract yourself you are going to overthink and worry. Try to do something that will make you feel good

.

2. The way you feel is like clouds passing in the sky. They too shall pass. Everything will pass. When you are anxious, you need to change your state. And How to change the state? It's very very easy.  According to research in Japan, it was found that to change a state it takes only Six Deep Breathes. Six deep breaths can change somebody's state from anxiety to peace. Also, check-in your posture.

Inhale deeply for four seconds hold for seven seconds and exhale out deeply at eight. 

3. Anxiety comes from your thoughts. Feelings come from thoughts. We are in charge of our feelings and thoughts. Anxiety and excitement are both aroused emotions. So you can trick your brain in actually thinking you are excited when you are anxious. Here how you do it. 

Become self-aware when you are anxious. Then close your eyes and put your hand on your chest and breathe. Then say to yourself I'm excited as many times as possible. Then ask yourself what I'm excited about? Well, I can be excited about going to the gym later. Also, you can be grateful for something. It requires extreme self-awareness.

4. Well, right now most people get anxious when they can't control any situation. You get each morning you watch the news -somebody died or anything bad. This makes you feel anxious as you are not able to control it. 

You need to focus on what you can control. Can you control all the things you are feeling anxious about?  No. Well, it's ok. Then what can you control?  You can control yourself. You can control your thoughts and breathing. You can control what you are doing at this moment. So then what makes you happy? 

The thing is all you can control is yourself. You can only change yourself.

5. Ask yourself “ Am I okay at this moment?”. Well, I know you are worried about your future or that you got to pay your bills .no big deal. But are you ok at this moment?. 

Because anxiety comes from things that are possibly going to happen in the future. When emotion is high, logic is low. 

When you are in a better state your logic will be higher.

In research, it was found that eighty-five percent of what people worry about doesn't even happen and fifteen percent of things that did happen were easier to handle than they actually thought they would be. 

 

The Ultimate Life Mantra

• Move out of your comfort zone.

Oftentimes, the most uncomfortable or painful experience that you’ll go through helps you grow as a human.

Only when you stop letting fears and anxiety hold you back, will you start to make those major breakthroughs in life.

•  Confidence is not being well-dressed but expressing who you truly are.

There is no price tag on confidence. The only way to have it is to unapologetically be you.

•  Practice good self-care habits.

Caring for yourself is not self-indulgent, but a necessary action for you to remain in good health — both physically and mentally.

With all the negativity, stress, and trials you encounter daily, you must give yourself time to recharge.

• Sometimes you will not be OK, and that is OK.

No matter how much we want to be strong, there will be times when the challenges in our lives are a bit too much. Be compassionate with yourself. It is okay to be down every now and then, but get professional help if you need it.

•  Never stop learning.

Learning does not stop after you graduate from school. Never stop being interested to learn something new or to further enhance a skill you already have.

• Stay curious.

Approaching each experience with a sense of interest and wonder can sustain your success.

•  Time is your ally. Use it wisely.

Our time is short. We could die at any time. Live your life like there is no tomorrow and leave no regrets behind.

• Beware of excesses.

There is the line that goes, “Too much of a good thing is bad.” Focus on quality instead of quantity, be it in about the things you own or the activities you do.

• You will not always get what you wish for.

But you will always be given what you need at the right moment. Sometimes, you don’t even realize you need it, whether it’s a life lesson, a material thing, a person, or an animal.

•  Stand by your principles.

Although it is easier to go along with the majority, stand firm in your beliefs. Do not allow others to make a doormat out of you. Learn to assert yourself.

• You can learn a lot from children.

Compared to adults, kids have an unbiased and open view of the world. They have this ability to put things in perspective in a way that many adults do not have or have forgotten.

•  Nature heals.

Spend as much time as you can in nature. Open the windows when it’s raining. While jogging or when walking the dog, appreciate the beauty that nature presents through the flowers that bloom or the amazing sunrise. It can do wonders for your health and well-being.

•  There is grace in apologizing.

Learning to say sorry when you are at fault is liberating as well as empowering.

•  But don’t let words of apology make up the most of your vocabulary.

Make sure to live in a way that you do not hurt people, and at the same time learn to recognize which things you have to reason for which to apologize.

•  Love with all your might.

To love and be loved in return makes everything worthwhile. So love your family and your friends. Do not take them for granted.

•  Give it time and you’ll get it right eventually.

Regardless of setbacks, try something at least three times before calling it quits. Chances are, you will have gotten it right before you give up.

• Failure is the greatest source of wisdom.

When you fail at something, take a look at what you’ve been doing. Adjust or change your approach until you achieve your objectives.

•  You don’t need that much sugar in your life.

Too much sugar in the diet has been attributed to numerous ailments. We’re practically consuming it even without being aware that it’s part of the ingredients of the food we eat. To achieve health and longevity, cut back on sugar.

•  Your intuition keeps you safe.

It is also known as your perception, your hunch, your gut, or discernment. There is actually a science about the power of our subconscious in steering us away from harm. Learn to listen to its message.

• There is power in silence.

In conversations, you gain so much by listening more and allowing others to speak their turn.

•  Life is happening as you read this.

If you’re putting life “on hold” until you get that promotion or after retirement, then you’re missing the whole point of it. Your life is what you’re making of it right now. Make it count.

•  Regardless of what you’ve achieved, there will always be someone better than you are.

The earlier you learn to accept it, the happier your life will be. Your objective in this life is not in competition with others. It’s about reaching your own potentials and walking your own path.

• Express your feelings.

Tell the people you care about how much you love them. If things upset you, learn to assert yourself without being aggressive. There is no positive benefit from bottling up your emotions. On the contrary, it can create health problems in the long run.

•  It will be challenging to live according to your values.

It will not be easy. You will always be tempted to take the easy way. Have the courage to stand by your beliefs and principles.

•  Travel is the best education you’ll get.

You will learn so much – about a culture, a place, and yourself – when you travel. Do it as often as you can. It is the best education you’ll have in the University of Life.

•  Things become clutter.

Things you have accumulated today might be cause for annoyance later. Learn how to make mindful purchases and avoid impulse buying.

•  Life is too short to leave out the fun.

We often force ourselves to be more serious in life in order to get ahead. However, life is short and laughter is often scarce. Carve out more opportunities for fun in your life. Forget about what others will think. Learn to enjoy your life.

• Exercise should be included in your priorities.

A sensible workout that fits your needs helps keep you healthy and strong. It also improves your sense of well-being and can help you live longer.

• Having a mask will keep people away.

If you have a habit of posturing and pretending to be someone else, you’ll drive people away. Express your true self is an effortless way of attracting people.

•  Letting go of the past helps release the pain.

Let go of the things that hurt you. Forgiving others has been proven to be highly beneficial to your health.

•  All of these are temporary.

Whatever challenges you’re experiencing now are all temporary. They, too, will pass. The same goes for the good times. Prepare your mind to accept change.

Follow These Steps And Say Bye To Anxiety

         

Follow these quick steps:

❤ Losen Yourself: 

If you are inside a room, open all the windows or run towards the balcony/ terrace.

If you are on your bed, keep the windows open and loosen up your clothes.

Let the external factors vanish that is causing you the anxiety.

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💆 Music can really capture you 

Create a playlist of songs that can really change your mood

(e.g. I have a playlist called breath which I play when I feel anxious and it has songs which take over my heart like Break Your Heart  by Taio Cruz, Smooth Criminal by Michael Jackson, etc.)

The idea of listening to songs while anxious is that music easily takes over your heart and your brain gets distracted as it starts focusing on the song lyrics.

Always remember, don't listen to emotional songs when you have anxiety. I strictly mean it.

🎇 Get Distracted

😂😂Watch some funny videos: Don't forget YouTube has a collection of funny videos, all you got to do is search them and start watching. 

(I usually search for funny animal videos, funny toddler videos, Ellen tube, any talk show funny moments)

You can also go for comedy movies and short films.

🌞IF YOU START FEELING ANXIOUS IN THE MORNING:

Well, its the start of your beautiful day, and the bacteria of anxiousness has already taken over you.

All you got to do is, GO FOR A WALK, DO EXERCISE, SHAKE THAT BODY let that sexy body distract you.

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At times you get affected by the environment around you and it becomes important to escape from that place, no matter you are at home, working in the office or in school, you can always stand near an open window, breathe fresh air and try to think about stuff totally different.

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🌊Keeping your Body Hydrated helps reduce ANXIETY!

So next time don't forget to grab a glass of water.

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🎌Have You Ever Tried Anxiety Games?

There are a lot of anti-stress games available on Playstore and App store one of them is  Antistress. They really do work!

☝And one last advice that I follow :

I usually keep a small diary with me and write down my thoughts and sometimes I use some curse words to take out my feelings.

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These are some ways to keep yourself away from anxiety.

Hope my blog was useful to you.

👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋👋

     💓Don't forget to comment so that  I can connect with you.

   May God Bless You With  A HAPPY HEART AND HAPPY MIND